Thursday, December 17, 2009


Monday, December 14, 2009

Do's and Don'ts using a Condom

To prevent HIV and STDs, condoms must be used each and every time. But they must be used correctly as well. Here are the do's and don'ts of proper condom use.


* Use only latex or polyurethane condoms.
* Store condoms appropriately. Keep condoms in a cool, dry place.
* Apply the condom on the erect penis before any sexual contact.
* Squeeze any area from the tip of the condom to minimize the possibility of leakage.
* Use a generous amount of water based lubricant to reduce friction and minimize the risk of the condom breaking.
* Pull out immediately after ejaculation, holding the condom in place to prevent it from slipping off and leaking semen.
* Dispose of the condom immediately after use.


* Never store condoms in hot places such as your wallet or car.
* Never use out of date condoms. Older condoms can be weak and break easily.
* Never unroll the condom before putting it on the penis.
* Never use oil-based lubricants such as Vaseline. They weaken condoms, increasing the risk of the condom breaking.
* never use your teeth or scissors to open a condom wrapper. This increasing the risk of cutting or tearing the condom.
* Never reuse a condom.
* Never allow the penis to go flaccid before pulling out. This can result in leakage or semen.

Tuesday, December 8, 2009

One round or More round of Sex Bout

I think, the best answer for this is: It depends on the couple on how they celebrate their sexual urges.

However, if you’ll ask me what’s better for me, then I will say that it’s better to have one but long round than having more but short rounds.

What’s the difference between long rounds and short rounds?

Well. In long rounds, say for example one hour round, the woman here will be enjoying much compared to the shorter rounds.

How would the woman enjoy this long and tiring round?
Okay… Sex is really tiring, whatever length of the activity. It just happens that in a long sex, both of the partners will enjoy exploring each body before engaging intercourse which is considered as the finale.

Let’s not forget that male can ejaculate easily in just a short period of time, and the ejaculation marks the end of the sexual activity. While female can hardly reach orgasm.

In other words, male must consider that truth. He should do some ceremonies first to give time to the female partner to prepare herself, enjoy the pleasure of your touch, caress and kisses, and letting her reach the peak of the pleasure which everybody calls “Orgasm”.

If say for example, you did your sex activity in an hour, to enjoy it, you will consume the 50 minutes on touches, caresses, kisses, even oral sex, and then the remaining 10 minutes will be for the real intercourse.

BF and GF, Enjoy Sex?

I want to remind you that sex has been given by God to the married couple only. If you’ll read the Bible about sex, you’ll learn that sex is not for non-married couple. Sex outside the marriage is considered sin and immoral.
And I want to tell you also that most of the non-married couple do not enjoy sex, because they’re psychologically disturbed. Below is the list of factors which can disturb the sexual activity of non-married couple.

  1. Afraid that what they did will result to unwanted pregnancy.
  2. Worries on what will the male do after it.
  3. Worries on what his family do to them if she’ll get pregnant.
  4. Worries on what will their neighbors think if they’ll know what they’re doing.
  5. Worries… worries… worries…
That’s the reason why most of the non-married females who engaged sex with their bfs became slimmer or thinner and experienced difficulty to sleep (So, I am giving you hint on how to identify those girls who engage sex with their bfs).
So, now if you really want to enjoy sex, then you must marry first.

Pinay Scandal, Pinay Celebrity Scandal, Pinay Sex Scandal

Pinay Scandal the most complete collection of Scandals on the Net. From Pinay Celebrity Scandals, Motel Scandals, to Places Scandals we have it; The complete collection of pinay scandal. This site contains video clips of pinay scandals; USC Scandal 2 - UST Scandal - UST Scandal 2 - Xavier Univ Scandal - Zamboanga Scandal. XEO Sites - Naughty Pinay Celebs - Pinay Pornstars …; SPC Scandal Tags: pinay : scandal Channels: Asian Added: 5 months ago by fish_82; If you are looking for pinay scandal related blogs or website, I think, I can help you. *wink* ;) .” These are the phrases how other webmaster describe their porn website. And as of writing this post, they are on the top rank when searching for Pinay Scandal using Google. And I need to steal those position.
Did you know that you’ll gain much traffic for your blog through the Pinay Scandal trend?
Yes! You can take advantage of the huge traffic coming from the Pinay Scandal surfers. Just take a look at the screenshot below of the graph of the traffic searching for the Pinay Scandal (image taken from Google Trend):

Pinay Scandal Trend
The traffic according to the graph started on the mid of 2005 and it continuously increases. This means that tons of web surfers are now looking for Pinay Scandals on the web.
What is Pinay Scandal?
Actually, this terms refer to the photos, videos or any stories that reveal shameful, sexperience, and secrets of some individuals or celebrities. This includes photos or videos taken at any places by secret cameras of two individual performing sex or any scandalous acts, and other similar videos or photos that expose someone’s secrets.
Below is the list of popular pinay scandal that real porn promote:
  • 1st Anniversary Scandal
  • AB Dog Style Scandal
  • Adamson University Scandal
  • After Shower Scandal
  • Alleged ABS-GMA Producer Scandal
  • Amanda Page Scandal
  • Annabelle Rama Scandal
  • Angela Tiongson Scandal
  • Angel Locsin Scandals
  • Angela Strip Scandal
  • Angelica Panganiban Scandal
  • Angelica Panganiban’s Nude Australian Picutre
  • Ang Nipples Scandal
  • Anna Jamp Sex Scandal
  • Ann Blow Job Scandal
  • Another Motel Scandal
  • Antipolo Scandal
  • Antonella Barba - American Idol Scandal
  • Aquinas University Scandal
  • Ateneo Zamboanga Scandal
  • Awake or not I’m gonna fuck you Scandal
  • Bacolod Scandal
  • Baguio Scandal
  • Baliuag University Scandal
  • Bea of Ateneo Scandal
  • Beyonce Flashes Boobs Scandal
  • Binibining San Jose Calumpit Scandal
  • Blue Escort Girl Scandal
  • Boarding House Scandal
  • Boobita Scandal
  • Boracay Scandal
  • Boy Bastos Scandal
  • Boys Night Out Scandal
  • Boys Night Out Scandal 2
  • Britney Spears K - Fed Sex Tape Scandal
  • Britney Spears Pussy Peek
  • Bukid Scandal
  • Bulacan State Univsersity Scandal (BSU Scandal)
  • Busy Girl Scandal
  • Butuan City Scandal
  • Butuan City Urios Scandal
  • Cabuyao Scandal (aka Teacher - Student Scandal)
  • Cabuyao Scandal 2
  • Cagayan Bulua Scandal
  • Car Fuck Scandal
  • Car Fuck Scandal II
  • Carmina Villaroel Scandal (Alleged)
  • Carmen Electra Scandal
  • CDR King Scandal
  • Cebu Boarding House Scandal
  • Cebu Scandal
  • CEU Scandal
  • Cheska of Arena Scandal
  • Che Che Scandal
  • Chinita Scandal
  • Chyx Alcala Scandal (Big Brother Housemate)
  • Cindy Kurleto Nip Slip Scandal
  • Cityland - Janice Scandal
  • Claudine Barretto Scandal
  • Closet Scandal
  • Commonwealth Avenue Scandal
  • Convergys Scandal
  • Cristine Reyes Photo Scandal
  • Cubao Scandal
  • Davao Central HS Scandal
  • Days Hotel Scandal
  • Dela Salle University Scandal
  • Diana Escort Girl Scandal
  • Diane of Tuguegarao (City) Scandal
  • Dingdong - Antonette Scandal
  • Divine World University Scandal
  • Divisoria Mall Scandal
  • Dolor Hotel Scandal
  • Don Bosco Scandal
  • Dressing Room Scandal
  • Driver-Maid Scandal
  • Dumaguete Scandal 2
  • Eda Nolan Scandal
  • Eda Nolan Scandal Pictures
  • Ely and Olan 2 Scandal
  • English Teacher Scandal
  • Ex-Gf Scandal
  • Famous Newscaster Scandal
  • Fatima School Scandal
  • FEU Scandal
  • Fil-Am Scandal
  • Filipina Fitness First Scandal
  • Filipina Texting Scandal
  • Fingering Scandal
  • Flores De Mayo Scandal
  • For my OFW Husband Scandal
  • Francine Prieto Photo Shoot
  • Ganda ng Puke mo Scandal
  • Gapan Scandal
  • Gastambide Scandal
  • General’s Daughter Scandal
  • GF is Drunk Scandal
  • GF Seduction Scandal
  • Girl Named Ruth Scandal
  • GirlFriend Teasing Scandal
  • Girl with Braces Scandal
  • Girls Showing Their Hooties Scandal
  • Gretchen Barretto - John Estrada Scandal
  • Hidden Cam in Motel Scandal
  • High School Scandal
  • Holy Angel University Scandal
  • Holy Cross of Davao College Scandal
  • Holy Spirit Scandal
  • Honda Cars Alabang Scandal
  • Househelper Scandal
  • Iligan Scandal
  • Iloilo Scandal 2
  • Indian Posing Nude Scandal
  • Iriga Scandal
  • Jacquie Estevez Scandal
  • Janina San Miguel Scandal
  • Janelle Manahan Sex Video
  • Japayuki Scandal
  • Jeepney Scandal
  • Jennylyn Mercado Scandal
  • Jollibee Scandal
  • JRU Scandal
  • Julie Scandal
  • Karel Maquez Scandal Video
  • Katrina Halili Scandal
  • Katrina Halili - Hayden Kho Sex Video Scandal
  • Keanna Reaves BJ Scandal
  • Keys Me Scandal
  • Kim Kardashian (sex tape) Scandal
  • Kim Kardashian Scandal Full Clip
  • Kristine Hermosa Upskirt Peek
  • La Consolacion College Scandal
  • La Salle Canlubang Scandal
  • Lei Ochoa Scandal
  • Lenny Scandal
  • Love Seat Scandal
  • Lucena Scandal
  • Madonna Blow Job Scandal
  • Makapal Buhok Scandal
  • Manado Scandal
  • Manny Pacquiao Scandal Pictures
  • Mapua Scandal
  • Maria Scandal
  • Maricris De Guz Scandal
  • Mariel Rodriguez Photo Scandal
  • Marikina Scandal
  • Marsman Scandal
  • Maui Taylor Camel Toe Scandal
  • Maui Taylor Radio Scandal
  • Maureen Larazabal Scandal
  • Medical Secretary Scandal
  • Memory of January 3 2005 Scandal
  • Metrobank Scandal
  • Michelle Estevez Scandal
  • Miss ko na baby ko Scandal
  • MMS Scandal
  • Monoblock Chair Scandal
  • Montojo Scandal
  • Motel Room No. 1 Scandal
  • My phone Video Shoot Scandal
  • Mutya ng Balanga Scandal
  • Nice Thrust Scandal
  • New Era College Scandal
  • New Video Shoot Scandal
  • Nursing Scandal
  • Nursing Student Scandal
  • NYP Students Caught In the Act Scandal
  • Oblation Run Scandal (University of the Philippines)
  • OFW Scandal
  • OFW Scandal II
  • OFW Scandal III
  • OFW in Saudi Scandal
  • Ooohhhh My Scandal
  • Pansol Quickie Scandal
  • Pamantasan ng Lungsod ng Maynila (PLM) Scandal
  • Papa Willy Scandal
  • Paris Hilton Picture Scandal
  • Pasay Lodge Scandal
  • Pasay Rotonda Scandal
  • Pau Scandal
  • Perpetualhelp Scandal
  • Pink Towel Scandal
  • Pissing Scandal
  • Playing with Self Scandal
  • Playing with Self Scandal II
  • Pose for Me Scandal
  • Prom Night Scandal
  • Public Stairs Scandal
  • Public Stairs Sex Scandal 2
  • Pussycat Dolls live in Manila
  • Mutya ng Balanga Scandal
  • Rave Fuck-Party Scandal
  • Restroom/CR Fuck Scandal
  • Riding Scandal
  • Richard Guiterrez - Anne Curtis Smooching
  • Rosanna Roces Body Shot
  • Rosanna Roces Webcam Show
  • Ruffa and Jessica Scandal
  • Ruffa Guiterrez Alleged Sex Scandal Video
  • Ruffa Mae Quinto Nipple Slip
  • San Agustin Scandal
  • San Beda Alabang Scandal
  • San Beda Go Scandal
  • San Pedro College Scandal
  • San Sebastian Scandal
  • Sarah UE Dance Troop Scandal
  • Sex Trip - Eye Ball Scandal
  • Sex with a Pinay Scandal
  • Shaina Magdayao Scandal
  • SM Crew Blow Job Scandal
  • Stag Party Scandal
  • Sta Mesa Scandal
  • St. Agustine Academy Scandal
  • Started at Sitting Position Scandal
  • STI MIsamis Scandal
  • Sunshine Cruz’s softcore flick
  • Super Ferry 15 Scandal
  • Tang Ina DSL Yan ( TIDY Scandal)
  • Teresa Scandal
  • This is my Dream Scandal
  • Tina Espano Scandal
  • Tisay si Tinay Scandal
  • Tit Shot Scandal
  • Tracy Torres Scandal
  • Tramo Scandal
  • Two in One Scandal
  • Union Bank Elevator Scandal
  • University of Batangas Scandal
  • University of Luzon Scandal
  • University of Pangasinan Scandal
  • University of San Carlos Scandal
  • University of Zamboanga Commerce Student Scandal
  • UP Scandal
  • Usant - Iriga Scandal
  • UST Scandal
  • Vanessa Hudgens Scandal
  • Via Escort Girl Scandal
  • Vicki Belo Hayden Kho Scandal
  • Victoria London Nip Slips Photos Scandal
  • Vivan Velez Scandal
  • Velez Sex Scandal
  • Woman in School Uniform Scandal
  • Woman on Top Scandal
  • Yan ang Suso Scandal (Translate to “Boobs Scandal”)
  • Yeah Yeah Scandal
  • Ynez Webcam Scandal
  • Zza Zza Pussy Peek

Sex and Pinay Scandal Related:
Other Bloggers Scandal Posts:
The Pinay Scandal trend just like what I said was started by Macuha and lots of bloggers participated this SEO thingy. Below is the list of few of bloggers who participated the Pinoy Scandal trend post:
  1. Pinay Scandal - Pinay Sex Scandal - Pinay Celebrity Scandal by BOYBATOS
  2. Pinay Scandal - Pinay Sex Scandal - Pinay Celebrity Scandal by PRIVATE EYE

Pinay Teen Sex

I was doing this experiments just to top the Google Search Engine when searching for the “Pinay Teen Sex“.
Recently, we’re successful on our previous experiments such as in:

  1. Pinay Teen Sex
  2. Free Pinay Sex
  3. Wanted Pinay Wife
  4. Pinay Sex Video
  5. Kwentong Kalibugan
  6. Hayden Kho Vicki Belo Scandal
  7. Katrina Halili - Hayden Kho Sex Video Scandal

Do’s and Don’ts in Fields Avenue

DO – Come prepared to have a good time.

DON’T – Think that the Philippines is nothing but a place full of bars and women that will have sex with you at the drop of a dime. The majority of females (including bargirls) in this country are extremely devout Roman Catholics, thus are extremely conservative. Approach the wrong one in the wrong way and you will either have your hands full, or feel like an extreme asshole.

DON’T – With the above in mind, absolutely DO NOT put down Catholicism. Filipino’s are extremely tolerant of many things, but you will lose A LOT of face to them if you insult God or the Catholic Church. I made the mistake ONE TIME of sharing my lack of belief in organized religion and it turned into a 3 hour-long debate with my ex’s uncle. Personally, I could have thought of more constructive things to do with my 3 hours.

DO – Use common sense when walking around. The Philippines is a relatively safe place, especially compared to the U.S. Let me put it to you like this though, would you go down an unfamiliar street in the dark if you were back home? Probably not, so why would you here? The majority of “problems” that you hear about involve a person being in a situation that could have been totally avoided. How many tourists or expats do you hear about being robbed on Fields Ave. or P. Burgos St? Virtually none compared to them take a little adventure that went astray……

DO – Leave the “freelancers” and “pick-up” girls on the streets alone, DO NOT pick them up. Yeah, maybe some could be looking to just get a little extra money, but think about it…if they are “working” for money, WHY aren’t they in a bar?! Underage? STD/VD? Bakla?! All of these could render some serious consequences for you, why try to save the tiny bit of money compared to getting a much safer girl. Be aware that Police in Makati will pickup underage girls and then transplant them on P.Burgos. As soon as she gets a customer, an undercover radio’s another guy that is waiting down the street and THEN YOU ARE FUCKED! I have seen it right before my eyes, trust me Police in Fields Ave in Angeles City have been known to plant underage girls and then bust into your hotel room, catching you “red-handed”. Both of these result in a lot of hassle, a lot of embrrassment and a lot of money.

DO – Always leave a tip for waiters/waitresses, ALWAYS. It absolutely kills me that some foreigners DO

NOT. The only time that I will fail to leave a tip is if the service is absolutely horrid. Think about this, that waitress that brought you food makes P200 ($4) a day!! Even your 20-peso tip will put a smile on her face and she will remember you, thus paving the way to better service in the future.

DON’T – Entertain a vendor unless you are really interested. BELIEVE ME ON THIS. you show the slightest sign of interest and you will be pestered for the rest of your trip. You acknowledge them with more then a “No” or a “no thank you” and they WILL follow you. you have been warned…

DO – If you have a favorite bar, tip the bartender. I do this regularly and my drinks come almost immediately, always in the bigger glasses and never lean on the alcohol. I walk in, they know me by name and my drink is on its way before my ass even touches the chair.

DO – Buy the mamasan a drink if she is being nice to you. I have quite a few here on Burgos that ALWAYS make sure I have exactly what I want and strike up a conversation with me (a REAL one). If the girls see the mamasan has respect for you and likes you (not like that, pervert!) they tend to be more relaxed because “mommy knows best” and you are obviously a “nice guy”. If you live here or are a regular here/plan to stay awhile, your reputation is EVERYTHING.

DON’T – Carry a conversation with a Filipino-male that is “extremely-nice” that you just met on the street. The majority of them want to sell you something, offer a “service”; basically it will revolve around them trying to get money from you. Just walk past them. This isn’t to say ALL are like that, but if you are reading this then you are obviously a newbie, so why take the chance??

DON’T – Think that your shit doesn’t stink. ALOT of us foreigners go to exchange our money into pesos and get a fat stack back. Some then feel that since they have all this money that they can do whatever the hell they want to. Again, your reputation is very important and asshole guys that act like they own the country get NO RESPECT from anyone. Sure, they will take your money and offer you service, but they also talk behind your back when they are away from you.

DO – If you barfine, tip. PERIOD. In Angeles City the girl gets 1/2 the barfine and guys feel inclined NOT to tip them. In Makati and Sabang Beach, the girl gets NONE or VERY LITTLE of the barfine and the tip is pretty much all that she gets. It seems to revolve mostly around European guys. Case in point: Sabang Beach. Many European’s go there and barfine. When the girl is done with her service they don’t tip, which obviously makes the girl rather upset. Now, because of you, some of the Sabang Beach mamasan’s are asking for the Barfine plus the Tip before you take the girl out.

DO – Tip appropriately. Tip too much and you are taken advantage of, tip too little and you are a cheap bastard. P500 in Angeles, P2000-P2500 in Makati, P2000 in EDSA and P1000 in Sabang. You CAN tip more and it’s always good to clarify with the girl before you take her just to make sure. Yes, it turns it into more of a “business deal”, however if you are starting to think money, then you do not like this girl enough to the point where the potentially extra P1000 doesn’t bother you..

DON’T – Listen to every foreigner that you meet. There is a decent amount of people out here that are flat out off their rocker. These days I prefer meeting and talking with Filipino’s in Makati more then a foreigner. Keep people at arms length until you get to see how they really are.

DO – Always be nice, always try to have a smile, and always keep a cool head. Remember that you are not in your country and the concept of “rapid service” flat out DOES NOT exist here. People move slower, lifestyle is slower. Don’t expect things to be the same here as they are in the States. I would refer you back to the tip hint above. Typically after I leave a tip, I will get a regular waitress that will serve me every time

DO – Go to the “Bar-lingo” area to learn a few words. It pays heavily, and the more you learn the language the better your experience will be. On top of that you can create many a good opening lines if you catch the girl talking in Tagalog to her friend saying that you are cute and you respond, “Thanks!” She will be surprised and giggle and it will pave the way to a good time. Be forewarned though, you go overboard with the Tagalog and they will try to talk to you exclusively in Tagalog. So when they ask, “Oh! You know to speak Tagalog”, you better make damn sure that you clarify that you know only a little!

DON’T – Be pressured to get a girl from the mamasan. It’s her job to introduce you to girls. Some guys like this, most DO NOT. Typically I will tell them that I am “window shopping” and they seem to appreciate this because it’s amusing and they know that you are at least looking. Try it, it works.

DO – Always clarify BEFORE you barfine that the girl IS NOT a cherry girl and that she doesn’t have her menstruation. If you find yourself in a bar and it seems that almost every girl there is a cherry girl (or claiming to be), then it should be a hint to you that it’s time to take your ball and go home (read: to another bar). It’s obvious that you are NOT well received here, so you might want to think about what you did wrong.

DON’T – Carry your passport or a large amount of money with you. It’s plain foolish. I know that technically you are required to carry your passport, JUST MAKE A COPY! Remember: you lose that and you are SCREWED. Also, take only the amount of money that you think you will need, leave the rest in the hotel, including your ATM Card. Remember: you lose any of these and your vacation is DONE! Some people are speculative of the hotel safe typically in the room. Personally I put my money in an random pocket in the clothes that I have packed.

Sunday, December 6, 2009


The traditional term for taking a girl out of the bar is “Barfine”. Recently the alternative phrase of “E.W.R. (Early Work Release) has been used because “barfine” was viewed as being synonymous with sex or prostitution. Bear in mind that prostitution in the Philippines IS illegal!

So what is the point?! you maybe asking yourself (and me). It’s like this: When you pay the EWR/Barfine to the bar, you are essentially paying a FINE to the BAR to compensate for the profits that they would lose for that employee leaving with you. To most people, this means that you would take the girl out, possibly go barhopping and the night would end with sex. Again, prostitution IS illegal in the Philippines, so when she leaves the bar, sex is technically NOT part of the agreement between you and the bar. It’s important to remember that because not all dates end up as the customer would like and often times he will try to get a refund because sex didn’t take place. Again, THAT aspect is between you and the girl so don’t even bother trying to include the bar UNLESS she broke a condition of your date that you previously agreed upon. Your only real chance of getting a refund is if the girl pulls (what we refer to) a “runner”. This means that basically you are out barhopping somewhere and your date asks you to hold on then NEVER returns.

Now, let’s say that you and her have sex after you barfine her. That is considered an event that takes place between two consenting adults and is outside the realm of the bars control. Sounds pretty lucrative, doesn’t it? It’s the law though and people have to follow it and these technicalities.

OK, so let’s be honest with ourselves here and state that you are interested in only barfining a girl that will have sex with you on your date (Hell, that’s the whole point back home anyways, right!). Well, that is something that you need to discuss with her BEFORE you pay the barfine. There are many variables that take place though and you, the customer, would be wise to be clear on all of them. View it as sort of an interview process so that you make sure that your date ends up the way both you and her would like.
First and foremost, we have the phenomenon known as Cherry Girls. These are virgin girls that work at the bar. They are typically easy to spot after your first couple of nights of barhopping. Usually they are interested in only going barhopping with you and/or getting you to buy them ladies drinks. They are the shyer girls you see in the bar and/or they can be door girls. These girls are typically very sweet natured and have not been hardened by the bar scenes yet. However, you should bear in mind that the likeliness of your “date” ending up in the sack with you is next to nill.

Cherry Girls aside, you also have the issue of the girl being on her period, having a boyfriend, being sick (as in cold), having to go to church in the morning, hygiene check the next day etc, etc, etc. Look; simply ask the girl or tell her exactly what you are looking for if you choose to barfine her. Again though, this is between two consenting adults so don’t bother asking the bar to get involved. Sometimes it IS beneficial to tell the Mamasan of the bar what type of date you are looking for and she can point in the right direction as to which one of her employees would make a good date for you.

Now that we have gotten the technical aspect of barfining out of the way, we will move forward on what to do. Hopefully you followed my little advice above and established what you would like to do with her since she went out with you. I typically like to go barhopping with my date and get to know her a little better as well as scope out the scenes in the other bars. Trust me when I say that the girls like going barhopping, and 99% of the time are more then willing to go around with you if ask. If you are hungry, ask her to join you for dinner. Take her to a movie, a disco, the mall; really anywhere you would go on a normal date with a girl. Sometimes these girls are referred to as a G.R.O. (Guest Relation Officer) and technically their job is to show you (the guest) around and have a good time.

At the end of your date (be it that afternoon/evening or the next morning) it is customary to tip her. Now, the art of tipping is HIGHLY debated by certain people but you should bear in mind the local scene that you are in (Angeles City, EDSA, Makati, Sabang) when taking this into consideration. For instance, tipping a girl in Angeles City 500 Pesos for spending time with you is considered a good tip. Giving the same amount in Makati to a girl will get your ass kicked. Remember, you are tipping her for her time showing you around and NOT for sex (prostitution IS illegal remember!), so your tip should really reflect that. If your date ended up exactly as you wanted it to, don’t be stingy.

I find that the easiest thing to do when tipping is to not just hand over the money like a chump and say, Here. Regardless of the outcome, I view it as demeaning to the profession that she chooses and a slap in the face to her. Instead, give her a little hug, slip it into her back pocket and say Thank you. If she has no back pockets, ask where her purse is really quick and slip it in there (be somewhat obvious about it though).

List of Hotels in Angeles City

Pacific Breeze Hotel

Pacific Breeze Hotel is another new on the scene in Angeles City. The management and Swimming pool make this one of the most favored places to stay. Price to value one of the best bets in Angeles City.
Amenities include, 24 hour restaurant, 24 hour room service, broadband internet, mini bar, Jacuzzi rooms.
ABC Hotel

Angeles Beach Club Hotel

ABC Hotel's 53 rooms and suites, new on the scene in Angeles. Located on Don Juico Ave (perimeter rd) opposite and west of checkpoint, not too far form the action and night-life.
Amenities include, restaurant with local and international dishes, swimming pool with real sand and palm trees, Spa / Massage clinic, comfortable lobby featuring plush furnishings, 24 hour Internet cafe, free for all registered guests, mini-mart convienience store, and an in-house travel agency.
The Master Penthouse has a 50 square meter living room, while the Junior Penthouse is 25 square meters. Each has a large, flat screen TV. Both Penthouses have a sleeping room of 40 square meters with a super king size bed measuring 2.5 x 2.5 meters. The bathrooms are 20 square meters large with Jacuzzi, sauna, and steam bath. All rooms have King sized beds.
Wild Orchid Resort

Wild Orchid Resort

Wild Orchid Resort   53 rooms. Opened mid 2005. Located near the corner of A. Santos & Johnny Street. Almost in the heart of the entertainment district.
Amenities include, 24 hour restaurant, 24 hour room service, Internet (LAN) in all rooms, wireless internet available thoughout the pool and restaurant area, out-door pool with swim-up bar and 2 jacuzzi, in house travel agency.
Dollhouse Hotel & Cafe

Dollhouse Hotel & Cafe

Dollhouse Hotel is another new on the scene in Angeles City. Located on Fields Ave. directly opposite the bar bearing the same name.
Amenities include, 24 hour restaurant, 24 hour room service, broadband internet, mini bar iwth coffee maker, daily newspaper, Roof top pool and jacuzzi.
Holiday Inn Clark Field

Holiday Inn Clark Field

By far the largest hotel in the Angeles City area. Holiday Inn Clark is just 5 minutes drive from the Diosdado Macapagal International Airport. The hotel offers 303 superior and deluxe rooms and one-bedroom suites and 34 two-bedroom garden villas.
Amenities include, tennis court, children’s day care center with baby sitting, swimming pool, full spa and a gymnasium and features two restaurants, a bar lounge and 24-hour room service. Just two minutes drive is the Mimosa Golf and Country Club, a 36-holes championship golf course.
It's location within the Clark Special Economic Zone (CSEZ) is miles away from the entertainment district. Taxi service available 24/7 to the bar area. Guests are welcome to join you in your room at no additional charge.
Cold Drop Inn Angeles City

Cold Drop Inn

Cold Drop Inn is located at 280-282 Friendship Hwy. They have lodging, food, and entertainment all in one location. Currently have 8 rooms available. With more being added.
Amenities incude, CATV with DVD, Broadband WiFi access. All rooms boast a King Sized bed. Restaurant, resonably priced food and drinks. Long and short term stays are welcomed.

Charinas Travel - Angeles City

Charina's Angeles City Travel
Charina's Travel is a full-service travel agent offering the very best in air, hotel, car, tour, corporate travel, honeymoon vacations and immigration assistance. Charina's Travel in Angeles City is accredited by the Department of Tourism (DOT) of the Philippines.

Angeles City, Pamapanga, Philippines Bars and Entertainment

Barangay Balibago, also known as the Entertainment District. Full of bars of all types. will list them for informational purposes. We will not comment on them, other than location, size and maybe affiliation with other bars in Angeles City. Also we will coment on those personally visited, however the coments shall be from a neutral standpoint, allowing you to draw your own conclusions. (everyone has their own likes and dislikes) Listing will be in no particular order at this time.
Treasure Island Bar

Treasure Island Bar

Treasure Island, a Go-Go bar that has been a favorite of tourists and locals since its inception. What Treasure Island lacks in size, it makes up for many times over in personality and sheer party excitement. Located at the heart of Field Ave. Balibago, Angeles City, Philippines.
Lollipop Go Go Bar

Lollipop Bar

Lollipop is one of Angeles City's most popular party spots! Located in the heart of the world famous Balibago entertainment district, Lollipop has everything you need for FUN! Sexy dancers, friendly waitresses, great music and drinks, plus plenty of cool air conditioning. Located near corners A. Santos & Fields Ave. Balibago, Angeles City.
Geckos Go Go Bar

Geckos Bar

The Angeles Bar scene is hot and Gecko's Bar is one of the most popular bars on Fields Avenue, Balibago. Gecko's has a reputation as a casual & relaxing place to drink & party. They always have a good selection of sexy young Filipina Go-Go Dancers, who are extremely friendly & always ready to party with you. Over the years, Gecko's has become a popular Angeles Bar to hang out in, meet & socialize. The music is a cross of Rock & Roll with a great mix of 70's & 80's hits. A great place, with wall-to-wall Filipina Bar Girls, excitement & entertainment
Roadies Bar Relaxing Fun

Roadie's Bar

Located on Perimeter Road - Don Jucio Ave. near the Friendship Gate. It's one of Angeles City's newest establishments. It will rate as a small bar by size, very good decor, with a customer friendly layout. As it's new I think it might be worth a try. Open hours 2pm - 12 midnight?
Lost In Asia Go Baby Go Bar

Lost In Asia

Located on Perimeter Road - Don Jucio Ave. near the Friendship Gate. Very near and just east of the Clarkton Hotel. A Friendly bar with a good lineup. Open from 2pm - 12 Midnight. It's a small bar in size, big in performance.

Angeles City

Angeles City Pampanga, Philippines - Clark Special Economic Zone

Angeles City, Philippines. Located in the central Luzon province of Pampanga. About 80 km North of Manila. Population nearing 300,000. Angeles City is divided into 33 barangays (political subdivisions). The Barangay of Balibago, also known as the Entertainment district, the area most who have visited, will know as Angeles City.

Angeles City, Pamapanga, Philippines Transportation

Transportation to Angeles City, Pamapanga. Most travelers will arrive at Ninoy Aquino International Airport (NAIA) in Manila on their visit to the Philippines. Taxi's are available to transport travelers to their destination. Excercise Caution when hiring a taxi for transport to Angeles City. Negotiate the fare with the driver in advance. DO NOT hire a taxi if there is a "friend" of the driver that wishes to go along for the ride. Diosdado Macapagal International Airport (DMIA)is located at the site of the former USAF Clark Air Base in Angeles City. Current carriers using DMIA for international travel. AirAsia, Asian Spirit, Asiana Airlines,Hong Kong Airlines, South East Asian Airlines, Tair Airways and Tiger Airways. Non international flights offered by Cebu Pacific .

The Hotels in Angeles City also, will arrange for transportation. Request your transportation at the time of making reservations. The hotels will have a car and driver on staff, or will hire one of the private transportation drivers. Hotel arranged drivers are usually very reliable and safe.

Thursday, November 19, 2009

Wondering how this Fields got its name?

I've been wondering how this Fields got its name. It must have been Clark "Field's" since it is adjacent to the southern buffer park from the highway leading to the former military installation.

However, I fancy that it might have been aptly named after W. C. Fields, indeed a very funny and uncanny American comedian of old (1880-1946).

The Pinatubo aftermath and the night club diaspora from Manila under Lim has made it international, putting it back to life after the Americans, with hotels and restaurants mushrooming here and there. So now we get Euros, Swiss Francs, Pound Sterlings, Yens, Wons, etc., making everything quite sky-high expensive (from tricycle rides to housing). On the positive side we get international cuisine and alcohol. I just love dem dar expensive Austrian Schnapps, German weissbier, French wine and Irish Guiness.

This Fields Street (Avenue is an overstatement) does seem to make Angeles City quiet "angel-less", as have been pronounced by American servicemen. The "notoriety" lives on with the new clientele and hosts.

If one can't be a monk here, one's gotta wear protection, considering that its literally a one-way street. Welcome and be of the Best of Health!

Wednesday, November 18, 2009

Story alone at Fields Avenue

How to write a blog entry about a place that has such an awful reputation as Angeles City in the Philippines? The place is possibly the sex capital of the world, with between 10.000 and 20.000 prostitutes selling their bodies every night. During the time of the U.S. airbase here, as many as 100.000 working girls were offering their services. I had a morning flight the next day from Clark airport just outside of Angeles, and decided to spend the night here instead of crazy Manila and see this place for myself.

I soon realised that accommodation in Angeles is definitely not geared towards backpackers, and after walking around for an hour in the afternoon heat with my backpack looking for an affordable place to crash I finally had to admit defeat. In the end I settled for a hotel far away from the "action", and spent the remaining afternoon enjoying the free wireless Internet by the pool writing the beginning of this blog entry.

And no, before anybody here gets any wrong ideas, I did quite easily resist the temptation all around me, though I do admit that I was curious and went

Bored prostitutes inside one of the countless bars

down to the red light district later in the evening. The main road is called Fields Avenue and is pretty much back to back full of raunchy bars with inventive names like "Coyote Ugly", "Pony Tail" or "Dirty Duck". Young female promoters in short skirts, tight tops and high heels are standing around everywhere, attempting to lure lonely customers into their respective bars.

I went into a few of them, somehow feeling pretty nervous. The scene was roughly the same in all three that I visited: There were maybe 50 scarcely-dressed women in each of them, some of them dancing on stages, most of them looking extremely bored. As one fat American guy I chatted to explained to me they are referred to as "Guest Relation Officers", or GRO, not prostitutes. Funny. On the other side of the spectrum there were the old and/ or fat Caucasian men, clinging to their drinks, also looking bored, or chatting with some of the girls.

Interestingly, prostitution is officially illegal in the Philippines, but that doesn seem to bother anybody here. The guy I mentioned earlier explained the system to me: To get around this tiny legal problem, a customer doesn
Going home after a hard night's work - Deserted Fields Avenue in the morning

actually pay the girl directly for her services. Instead, you pay the bar the girl is working for to get her released early from her shift. This is called a "bar fine". The girl gets a cut from this money and whatever happens next is then the decision of two consenting adults. Quite a clever solution I would say.

Sitting in another bar having an overpriced mango juice I had to think of a movie I saw a while back. In the movie an NGO camera team went around a red light district somewhere in Asia asking the old men with their 20-year old prostitutes questions like "Hello sir, is this your daughter?". Great question, I love it!

I also wondered what impressions the Filipinos living and working here must get about foreigners. Or, on the other hand, what image does all this give foreigners about the Philippines? I can only assume that most of the girls working here do so out of pure desperation with few alternatives available to them in this impoverished country. Then again, it must also be a cultural thing somehow, as I have been to many poor countries here in Southeast Asia, where prostitution was at a minimum. I guess I will never get to the bottom of it, the issue seems just too complex to comprehend, especially by an outsider and foreigner like me.

In the same bar I asked the waitress how much she earns working there. Her salary is 90 pesos per day (by the way, a value meal at McDonalds costs more than what she earns in a day), plus tips if she is lucky. That is about one Euro and thirty cents for a nine hour shift. The dancers, who have to wear considerably less clothes and dance on the stages, get a bit more, 150 pesos a day, about 2 euros. If a girl goes home with a customer, she gets 600 pesos, roughly nine Euros. Most of the girls apparently send the money they earn home to their families, with many of them being single mothers working here to support their children. The waitress I talked to was 27 years old, had four children who are being raised by her parents, and an ex-husband who left her without giving her her any support for raising their children. She has never finished high school (her parents
"Dancers" wanted everywhere

had no money for that) and she told her family that she is working as domestic helper for a rich family near Manila. I am not sure, but I could imagine that this is a pretty typical story for many of the girls working here.

And to put the above figures into perspective: Before coming to Angeles about a year ago, the waitress I talked to used to work in a factory earning 800 pesos a month, about 12 Euros. This is roughly the amount of money I spent two days ago for a 30 minute boat ride to Taal Volcano and a few biscuits for my breakfast. Here in Angeles, she can make those 800 pesos in a single day if she manages to find a customer who wants to take her home for the night. But even if she only works as a waitress and assuming she gets no tips at all, she still makes about 2200 pesos a month, or 32 Euros, three times as much as she got in the factory. And if she is lucky and finds a customer regularly, she can earn a small fortune compared to her other (non-prostitution) options. Thus is the sad reality.
Not a pretty city by far whichever way you look at it

In the last bar I went to, aggressive girls kept coming up to my table asking if I would buy them a drink. As I gathered they get a commission for every drink a customers buys them. But having ventured far enough into this alien and sad world I soon took my leave and walked back to my hotel through the rainy evening, wondering how many other male foreigners were sleeping alone in their beds that night.

The next morning, I caught a jeepney for the 20 minute ride to Clark airport. It was time to leave the Philippines after three weeks, as my visa was running out. Unfortunately, Angeles was definitely not the best place to say farewell to this beautiful country with its wonderful people, but the contrast with this utterly depressing place made me realize what an amazing time I have had in the Philippines. I hope to be back one day.

Petition to Close The Red Light District of Fields Ave.

To: People of the World

This is a petition calling for the closure of the brutal and vile red light district in Fields ave, Angeles. As a citizen of Angeles with a family, i am disgusted and sickened by the human trafficking of women and children by organized crime syndicated in fields ave.

Our government stands by and does nothing while women and children every day and night are trafficked by brutal gangs of Australians, Americans and other foreign gangs to the thousands of Pedophile tourists that flock to Fields ave every year.

Filipinas are subject to this constant degradation and humiliation of our women and children and our corrupt government does nothing. The only thing the Philippine Government does is attack and abuse the charities and welfare agencies that are trying to expose the crimes of fields ave.
The government talks no action against the foreigners involved in the trafficking or the pedophile customers.

Its time to say enough is enough!

We the Filipino people want an end to these dirty , vile and disgusting bars in Fields ave that form for the most brutal prostitution trade the world has ever seen.


Tuesday, November 17, 2009

Dictionary of Obscure Sexual Terms

Angry Dragon
Immediately after you blow your load in a girl's mouth, smack the back of her head and make it come out her nose. When she gets up she'll look like an angry dragon.

Arabian Goggles
A "seldom-seen" maneuver when you put your testicles over her eye sockets while getting head. (Picture it: ass on forehead) It may be anatomically impossible, but what the fuck else is new.

The Bait N' Tackle
The sailors used this one in the old Navy days. Before you go off for a long, lonely voyage, get yourself a tall jar and fill it completely with earthworms. When you get lonely, open the jar and fuck away. The earthworms will provide some slithery stimulation, and your protein load will keep them nicely fed. Gone fishing!

Takes some luck of the gene pool, but if you're able to do it, always great fun. While you are straddling her, take your nutsack and spread it out over her face like pizza dough.

Bear Claw
A synonym for extremely large pussy lips.

Beef Curtain
The shanked out remains of the labia after being stretched like Play-Doh from an hour or so of jimmy-jam.

Beer Dick
This is what most guys get after a good night of drinking. They tend to fuck anything with a pussy while experiencing beer dick.

You need to find a real tramp to do this right. It involves having her sucking you off while you are on the shitter.

The Bronco
You start by going doggy style and then just when she is really enjoying it, you grab her tits as tight as possible and yell another girls name. This gives you the feeling of riding a wild bronco as she desperately tries to buck you off.

Brown Bagging It
Sometimes you meet a girl with a body like there's no tomorrow but a face like a mangy dog. Don't let that body go to waste and let her hideousness stop you from fucking her though. Just draw the smiley face on a brown paper bag, place it over her head, and fuck away while keeping your composure and piece of mind.

Brown Necktie
You're about halfway through ass-wrecking a chick, and instead of filling up her keister with your demonseed, you pull out and proceed to tittie fuck her, leaving a brown streak between the funbags.

When a man puts his face between a woman's breasts and quickly moves his head back and forth while saying "Brunski" in a very drawn out and exaggerated manner. (There are many other variant names.)

The Bullwinkle
The sign given to a friend in hiding while doggie styling' some chick. It is performed by placing both hands over the head, with palms facing out and waving wildly. Can be supplemented by shouting "Hey Rocky." (Make sure to use appropriate Bullwinkle voice tone.)

Butter Face
When you see a chick with an awesome body, "but her face", is nasty.

The Canine Special
Liberally apply peanut butter to your dick and call over the family dog. Lick Ubu lick. Good Dog. Arf!

The Carpet Cleaner
While banging a girl doggy style, tie her arms behind her back, lift up her hips, and run around the room pushing her face first across the carpet. Not recommended with large women.

The Chili Dog
When you take a hot dump on a girl's tits and then proceed to titty fuck her.

Chocolate Pizza
Happily discovering hemorrhoids while eating a shitty brown eye.

Cleveland Steamer
The act of leaving a shit stain on the rib cage of a woman while receiving penile pleasure from friction between the mammaries.

Cold Lunch
The act of vomiting directly onto some chick's head while she's performing fellatio.

The Concoction
First, ejaculate all over the floor. Next, have your psycho bitch girlfriend menstruate on your semen. Stir it with your finger until you get a nice thick pink mixture. Proceed to paint yourselves up silly, just as if you were in kindergarten again.

The Compton Gangbang
You meet a young lady at the bar. She tells you she has a boyfriend, but she ends up going home with you anyway for a one-night stand. When you take her to your place, tell your friends to wait outside your bedroom door. Just when she's about to get off, your friends barge in the room and plainly beat the shit out of her. That should teach her not to fuck around. (Ladies, feel free to perform a Compton Gangbang on guys too. I know you've got some fat girlfriends to help you out.)

Cop's Delight
The act of taking a girl in the ass, pulling out, and spewing all over her "pastry buns", thus transforming her rump into the allusion of an oversized, quivering glazed donut.

The Corkscrew
Cross your fingers, middle over index. Twist your wrist back and forth and go to work on your desired orifice. With practice, you'll have the effectiveness of a dill press and within weeks you'll be able to bore through wood.

Originating from the fine campus of Cornell University comes this unique, rarely used term. Saying that a girl is "Corn" means, she is so fucking hot, so beautiful, so utterly drop-dead gorgeous, that you would happily eat the corn out of her shit. Can be used as a great pick-up line or friendly compliment, for instance; "Baby, you're more Corn than Green Giant", or "Damn bitch, you are Corn!"

Couch Bombing
When you fill a small ziploc sandwich bag with Crisco (or your favorite lubrication) and place it between the cushions on the couch. You then proceed to fuck the couch as if it were a woman...but no need to buy It dinner first

This occurs when you wake up in the room of a nasty wombat and you know you've got to give her the slip. However, you realize that your arm is wrapped around her. Therefore you must gnaw off your own arm to get out of the situation. Can be very painful.

Cum Dumpster
A quadriplegic whore.

Cum Guzzling Sperm Burping Bitch
The once in a lifetime act when blowing a hot steamy load down the back of the girl's throat, proceed to give her a large cold bottle of your most favorite carbonated drink and make her guzzle it down. Then, shake her head vigorously back and forth to create the Cum Guzzling, Sperm Burping effect. A great way to impress your friends.

Daisy Chain
Partner (A) is sucking off or eating out partner (B) who is sucking off or eating out partner (C) and so on until the final person is sucking off or eating out partner (A). Partners can be gay, lesbian or straight.

Davey Crockett
A sexual maneuver in which you slip muscle relaxants into your gal's snizzpod, then slide your head in, thus wearing your partner's now-relaxed snatch-fur as a coonskin cap. Can come in handy on those cold winter nights.

Dirty Sanchez
A time honored event in which while laying the bone doggie style, you insert your finger into her asshole. You then pull it out and wipe it across her upper lip leaving a thin shit mustache. This makes her look like someone whose name is Dirty Sanchez.

Dirty Swirly
While boning a chick doggie style near a toilet (preferably one filled with a healthy load of shit, or some hot piss, or both), stick her head in the toilet and flush...she'll dig it.

Dog In A Bathtub
This is a proper name for when you attempt to insert your nuts into a girl's ass. It is so named because it can be just as hard as keeping a dog in the tub while giving it a bath.

Donkey Punch
Banging a girl doggy style and then moments before you cum, you stick your dick in her ass, and then punch her in the back of the neck. The blow to the neck will stun the muscles in the female's ass, which will constrict the penis and give you a tremendous orgasmic experience when you ejaculate.

Duct Tape Trick
Wrapping a hamster in duct tape so you can safely fuck it without the danger of a messy split.

Dutch Oven
Entrapping an unsuspecting sleeping partner in a world of ass odor by farting under the covers and pulling them over her head (and yours as well if you're into that sort of thing).

Dutch Treat
The unexpected result of a Dutch Oven gone terribly awry. Can be very messy.

The abbreviation for "double-anal, double-vaginal". This is the term used when a girl takes four cocks in two holes. A hard core porn industry norm.

The Electric Chair
Your psychobitch girlfriend decides she wants to try something kinky, so she props your stupid naive ass up in a chair, strips you down, and ties you up. After arousing you, she then takes a car battery and clamps two jumper cables to each nut sack. This causes you to have all sorts of synapses, spasms, and convulsions. She then mounts your Frankenstein and proceeds to get electrofucked. Warning! May cause erectile dysfunction after performed.

A gay activity which I do not condone at all. It happens when one fag fucks another fag in the ass and then sucks the jizz out with a straw. Only included for those of you who are considering going to jail. *note: never seen it done with a straw...

The Fish Eye
From behind, you shove both fists in her ass (or his if in prison). Thereupon she turns around in a one-eyed winking motionsignaling that she has been there and done that.

When you pull back towards the pussy after you stick your finger up her anus.

The Fire Island
This consists of telling someone you're going to spunk on their face while they are asleep, only half-jokingly, and then when they don't believe you, doing it just to prove that you're that demented.

Flaming Amazon
This one's for all you pyromaniacs out there. When your screwing some chick, right when your about to cum, you pull out and quickly grab the nearest lighter and set her pubes on fire, then...extinguish the flames with your jizz!

Flooding The Cave
Inserting the penis into a woman's pussy and then urinating inside her. Applies to butt pirates as well.

The Flying Camel
A personal favorite. As she is lying on her back and you are hammering her from your knees. You very carefully move forward and prop yourself (without using your arms) on your dick while it is still inserted in her vagina. You then proceed to flap your arms and let out a long shrieking howl much like a flying camel. Strictly a class move.

The Flying Dutchman
This didn't used to be a specific deviant sexual act, it was just a phrase that sounded dirty and would be shouted out during intercourse on occasion simply for the novelty factor. However, its popularity increased and it has now developed into a specific act, namely that of, just as you are about to blow a load, in any sort of sexual situation (even masturbation for those true pioneers who are constantly on the cutting edge of the sexual revolution) you begin to shout, "Here comes the Flying Dutchman!" This should confuse your sexual partner (or whoever is in hearing range) completely, sometimes causing interesting side effects.

The Fountain Of You
While sitting on her face and having her eat your ass, jerk off like a madman. Build up as much pressure as possible before you release and spew like a venerable geyser all over her face, neck and tits. (Better in her bed)

Fur Ball
You're chomping away at some mighty trollop who has a mane between her legs the size of Lionel Richie's afro, a mammoth hair ball gets lodged into your throat.

With two hands, spread your tramp's anus open, then spit a big-ass loogie down the asshole then close it back up. You can give her a smack on the ass when you're done, if you want.

Golden Shower
Any form of dropping piss all over your partner. Great for those who like watersports.

The act of using your "glue stick" (if you know what I'm saying) and gluing your gal's eyes closed with your man seed. E.g. "Hey guys, check it out, I just greeked her!" or "Sorry honey, but you asked for the Greek salad

Ham And Cheese Sandwich
Eating a woman's box after you ejaculate all over it. A delightful, tasty combination of her yummy meat curtains with your added cheesy topping is sure to appeal to anyone's appetite.

Hershey Highway
When plugging your girl in the ass, you run into some hot diarrhea. Don't hurt her feelings by getting grossed out though, just pretend it's extra lube.

High Dive
The skill of pulling your Johnson all the way out of your partner's hole and in one motion jamming it home again. Best suited for use in the corn hole, but can be very dangerous.

The Hindenburg
When some slut who is so bad at oral sex, you're forced to cry "Oh! The humanity!" as her teeth scrape your man tool.

While intoxicated, high, or just plain desperate, you go searching for the fattest bitch you can find and proceed to ride her like a Harley. Best accomplished with large groups friends.

Hole In One
The act of sticking your dick in your own ass. Just try not to get a huge boner once it's in, or you'll get a nice snapparoo.

Hotdog In A Hallway
When laying the pipe, you realize your dick isn't even touching the walls of her vagina, kind of like tossing a hotdog in a hallway. Most frequently happens when banging the neighborhood trick or if you're slinging a small dick.

Hot Karl
The act in which a woman sucks the cock of the same man who moments earlier was balls deep in her can. Also known as ass-to-mouth, A2M and ATM.

Hot Karl Candy Cane
A variation of the above in which the man who is receiving the oral cock cleaning gives the woman a reach around.

Hot Lunch
The result of defecating a tube of shit directly into a girl's mouth.

The well known added variation to a blowjob in which a broad hums her favorite tune while she sucks away. The vibrations felt against your dick will most definitely produce a healthy orgasm.

The Hunter Gatherer
You and your partner defecate while 69ing. Pretty much self-explanatory.

The Indian Cock Burn
While a chick sucks you off, she twists her hand around your shaft as if she was trying to give you an Indian burn.

The Jedi Mind Trick
When banging your partner, you repeatedly shout "I'm NOT fucking you, I'm NOT fucking you".

The Jelly Donut
Give some skank a facial and follow it up with a swift pimp crack in the nose. The resulting blood and jizz that covers her face bears a resemblance to a jelly donut.

The Juanita Special Bean Dip
While your tramp rides you like a mechanical bull, insert your thumb into her poop chute (be sure to get your thumb nice and gooey), then stick your brown thumb into her mouth, and slip it under her tongue so she can get the full robust taste of the Juanita "special" bean dip.

Kennebunkport Surprise
The act of covertly filling your cheeks with chunky-style New England clam chowder, and screaming in disgust as you hurl it between your partners legs while eating her out.

The act of receiving sexual pleasure from repeatedly getting kicked in the ass.

The Landshark
The woman braces herself facing a wall, naked, hands against the wall, legs spread, bent over so that her ass is lusciously jutting out. (hint: She might want to wear a biking helmet and some rollerblading wrist guards to avoid serious injury.) Next, the guy also naked as well as stiff cocked, walks to the opposite end of the room, places his palms together and raises them above his head, (thus imitating the dorsal fin of a shark) and begins chanting the theme to Jaws. When given some predetermined signal, the guy sprints toward the girl at full speed with his pelvis-out, fin protruding, and rams her dead square in the ass.

The Lorena Bobbit
Obviously, this one is for the ladies. When engaging in some hard core booty sex, squeeze your butt cheeks together as tight as you can, and start violently jumping and thrashing your ass around, in an effort to rip his dick off. (To reach true Lorena status, you must take the severed dick for a drive and then toss it out the window.)

The Menthol
The act of getting head from a woman who just moments earlier ate a numerous amounts of cough drops, thus insuring a pleasurable, tingly feeling on your cock.

The Mellon Dive
Headbutting a woman's big fat titties. Always lots of fun.

Monkey Wrench
When some sadistic bitch takes your dick back between your legs and sucks you off.

Monroe Transfer
When you and your partner connect each other's assholes with a tube. One defecates through the tube, thus transferring the turds to the rectum of the other.

The Moped
A chick that's a fun ride until your friends see you on it, if you know what I mean.

The Mork
Made famous by Robin Williams on Mork & Mindy, stick your pinky and ring fingers up a girls ass, then jam your middle and index fingers up her cunt. (Please note: Not complete until you finish it off with a Nanoo-Nanoo!)

A man who enjoys going down on a woman during her period. Derived from the Biblical figure Moses, who parted the Red Sea.

The Motorboat
While performing oral sex on a girl, flap your lips together on her clit, thus imitating the sound of a motorboat. She'll love you forever.

Muff Teaser
Finger, suck, eat, etc. a girl until she is begging for it. Then rub your stiffy round her golden valley until she screams at you to give her a banging. Right when her frustration is at its highest level, stop and finish with a DIY(do it yourself) handjob. Then leave the room without saying a word. Not to be tried if you want to shack up with the selfish bitch again.

The Mung
Obtain a female that has been dead for 2-3 days (the time period since death is important). Then place your mouth just outside her vaginal opening. Have a friend jump on her stomach, and try to catch as much stuff that comes out as you can in your mouth.

Mushy Biscuit
This is actually a very fun game. Just choose a piece of food that you and your male friends like to eat. Then you and your buddies form a tight circle around the food item and proceed to jerk off all over it. Last one to bust a nut gets the prize of eating the food.

New Jersey Meat-Hook
The unusual method of inserting one's finger in the ass of your partner while screwing her, and feeling her cervix. This procedure is most effective from behind.

New York Style Taco
Anytime when you are so drunk that when you go down, you barf on her box. Happy trails.

The Nixon
A variation of the Bullwinkle in which you give two peace signs as your signal of dominance. May enhance the act by shaking jowls and yelling, "I'm not a crook". This is considered very bold and is frowned upon for those with a modicum of decorum.

A derivation of the tea bag which is accomplished by numbing one's testicles with ice and then inserting them in a chicks mouth and letting the tramp munch on them.

Pasadena Mudslide
This happens when you leave a windy shit between the breasts of a woman while you straddle her neck for a blowjob. (A close cousin to the Cleveland Steamer.)

While you're nailing some girl doggie style and your friend is catching some head off the same girl, you get a quick game of pattycake going. This makes you reminisce of your childhood memories and eases the sight of watching your friend blow his load.

Paying The Rent
A position in which the woman is folded in half, knees above shoulders, while the man holds the back of her calves and bangs ferociously.

Peanut Butter And Jelly Sandwich
Shit on a woman's snatch during menstruation. Proceed to munch. Mmmm Mmmm Nasty! (Crunchy or smooth...depending on what you've been eating.)

Pearl Necklace
Well known. Whenever you cum on the neck/cleavage area of a girl - it takes on the look of beautiful jewelry. Fuck that diamonds are forever shit.

The Pig Roast
While you're plugging some girl's hole doggie style, (up the dirt road or the funhole, pick your poison) she's blowing your best friend's cock at the same time, hence simulating a pig on a spit. Very Similar to Chinese Finger Cuffs.

Pink Glove
Hate when this happens. Every so often a girl is not wet enough during sex. When you finally pull out to give her money, the inside of her twat sticks to your hog. Thus, the pink glove.

The Pirate's Treasure
While fucking your girl in the ass, you strike a hefty load of shit. After you've found this buried treasure deep in her booty, you scream, "Argh!", like a pirate.

Take a clear, glass plate and place it on your partners face, then shit on it. It gives them a nice view without all the messy cleanup. How come you don't see that on any Dawn commercials.

The Popcorn Trick
First, take your girlfriend to the cinemas, for a nice romantic date. Buy a tub of popcorn, wait until the lights dim, and carefully make a hole in the bottom on the tub. Then, inconspicuously insert your penis through the bottom of the tub into the popcorn and casually offer some to your bitch. When she digs in, she will find nice surprise. Who doesn't love buttered popcorn?

Puerto Rican Fog Bank
While 69ing with your partner, release a cloud of sphincter fog directly into her nostrils.

Purple Mushroom
This occurs when a woman is giving you oral sex and you withdraw your penis in order to poke it back into her cheek. It should leave a lasting impression similar to a purple mushroom.

A well known, but sometimes embarrassing occurrence. Queefing happens when air gets trapped in a girls vagina, and makes a soft hissing, or farting kind of a sound while that air is released.

The Ram
When attacking from behind, you start ramming her head against the wall in a rhythmic motion. The force of the wall should allow for deeper penetration. Very handy in those lulls in penile sensitivity.

Rear Admiral
An absolute blast. When getting a chick from behind (while both partners standing), make sure you don't let her grab on to anything when she is bent over. Then, drive you hips into her backside so that you end up pushing her forwards. The goal is to push her into a wall or table. It's almost as much fun watch her

To Avoid a Hangover, Drink Plenty (of Water)

"One of the biggest problems with avoiding and treating hangover is recognizing the misconceptions," said Dr. Marc Siegel, an internist and clinical professor of medicine at the New York University School of Medicine.

He believes the best remedy -- and preventive -- for a hangover is also the simplest: Drink lots of water.

"Remember, the main cause of hangover is dehydration -- alcohol is a really powerful diuretic, and people get much more dried out when they drink than they may realize," Siegel said. "So the most important thing to do -- before and after a hangover -- is to drink water."

Smart punters ideally alternate one glass of water for every drink consumed, providing their body with extra fluid to compensate for what's been lost. "Some kind of electrolyte solution, such as Gatorade, might be good, too," Siegel suggested.

And remember, what you imbibe may be as important as how much you imbibe when it comes to hangover.

"While all alcohol can cause hangover, wine tends to cause more headache," Siegel said. "Also any drink with lots of sugar in it -- that has a dehydrating effect separate from the alcohol."

Despite the best precautions, a hangover can still rear its aching head come sunrise. Siegel advised that, besides drinking copious amounts of water, the following remedies may help:

  • Coffee. A cup of java can cut headache, but watch out -- it's another diuretic, so don't refill that mug too often.
  • Analgesics. Again, moderation is the key. "They're good to use for headache, but Tylenol [acetaminophen] is toxic to the liver, like alcohol, while aspirin is toxic to the stomach -- again, like alcohol," Siegel said. A regular Tylenol or two is fine, but any more than that might be hazardous.
  • Exercise. A workout can be great for your circulation and might perk the body up, but it dehydrates, so be sensible about it.
  • Prickly pear cactus flower. "It's a new remedy on the market now, and it seems to soothe the stomach, but it's also another diuretic," Siegel added.

Then there are more dubious hangover "cures," some of which might do more harm than good:

  • Staying awake. There's a theory that keeping awake through the night somehow inhibits the buildup of toxins within the body. "That's a nice idea, but unfortunately it's never been proven," Siegel said.
  • Hair of the dog. Many swear by a nip of alcohol the morning after to take the edge off a hangover. "It can work, but it's a really poor treatment," Siegel said. "Ultimately, you're hangover is going to catch up with you later on, with even more dehydration and more toxins."
  • RU-21. This drug -- originally developed by the Russian KGB -- is designed to ward off a hangover even among those who drink heavily. "I'm not a fan of RU-21," Siegel said. The buildup of toxins "is a warning sign that we've drunk too much. Without it, you may drink more, get more inebriated, and do something like drive drunk."
  • Spicy meals. While some are hot on the idea that Kung-Pao chicken for lunch thwarts a hangover, spicy meals "may add to the problem," Siegel said. "They simply give your [gastrointestinal] tract another problem to deal with."

In the end, he said, the best way to treat hangover is to avoid getting one in the first place. That means pacing yourself when it comes to drinking, and consuming lots of water. "Water is great, too, because it flushes out the kidneys," Siegel said, "increasing the rate at which toxins are gotten rid of."

Why do they call it Fields Avenue?

Do they think it was named in honor of W. C. Fields?

You hear people say, “Fields Avenue” or simply “Fields” when they are referring to Field Avenue. Look around the Internet and you will find this is a common error even in print. It seems many businesses located on Field Avenue have perpetuated the error by listing their address as being on Fields Avenue (with the “s”).

Field Avenue was not named in honor of W. C. Fields or any other person with the name Fields. It started out as a road next to an army airfield and as was common practice it was named Field Avenue.

If you look at old maps or street signs you will find the spelling to be “Field” (without an “s”).

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